How to Cope With the Two-Week Wait

The two-week wait is the time between ovulation, an insemination or an embryo transfer and the day a pregnancy test can give you an answer. Nothing is required of you, and that is exactly what makes it hard. If you find yourself analyzing every twinge, you are not doing it wrong; researchers have measured how much harder this stretch is than the rest of a cycle. This guide explains what is happening, when testing can work, and coping tools that have been studied.

Why the two-week wait is so stressful

The wait combines high stakes, uncertainty and no control. In a randomized trial of 377 women having IVF or ICSI, anxiety and depression scores were significantly higher during the waiting period than before treatment began.¹ A 2018 review describes the two weeks between transfer and pregnancy test as a very stressful time during IVF.⁶

It helps to know one thing early: stress in the wait does not decide the result. ASRM says it is not clear how stress affects fertility, and that it is not known whether high levels of stress can prevent pregnancy.⁵ The goal of coping is to make the wait easier to live through, not to "relax so it works".

What is happening in your body

After ovulation, a fertilized egg takes several days to travel to the uterus and implant. In a classic study that tracked hormones daily, implantation, marked by the first appearance of hCG in urine, happened 6 to 12 days after ovulation, and in 84% of ongoing pregnancies on day 8, 9 or 10.³ Until then, there is no pregnancy hormone for any test to detect.

That is also why it is so hard to read anything into how you feel in the first week. Our day-by-day guides to days past ovulation explain what is and is not possible on each day.

When can you take a pregnancy test?

FDA advises that for the most reliable result you test 1 to 2 weeks after you miss your period, using first-morning urine, and notes that some tests are sensitive enough to detect pregnancy before a missed period.⁴ It also says that 10 to 20 of every 100 pregnant women will not detect their pregnancy on the first day of their missed period, often because of irregular cycles or miscounted dates.⁴ After IVF, follow your clinic’s instructions on when and how to test.

Use the calculator below to find the earliest sensible test day for your cycle, and see how many days after ovulation you can test for the details. If you want a test that detects lower hCG levels, check the sensitivity on the box.

Coping tools that research supports

Read a short set of reappraisal statements twice a day

Researchers designed a pocket card of 10 "positive reappraisal" statements for women in the IVF wait. The statements do not promise a positive result; they encourage you to take account of the positive aspects of a stressful, uncontrollable situation.⁶ In a pilot of 55 women, the card was rated more helpful and better suited to the situation than a card of general positive-mood statements.² In a larger trial of 377 women, it did not lower measured anxiety, but women using it reported more positive emotions during the wait and found it easy to use.¹

You can write your own version. Examples in that spirit:

• "Whatever the result, I have done everything I could this cycle."
• "This wait is hard, and I am getting through it one day at a time."
• "I can still enjoy small things today."
• "I do not have to know the outcome to take care of myself."

Decide your test day in advance

Pick one test date based on your cycle or your clinic’s instructions, write it down, and put tests out of sight until then. A test cannot be positive before implantation, because there is no hCG yet,³ so very early tests mostly bring negatives that do not mean anything yet.

Limit symptom-checking and forum time

Set a time limit for reading about symptoms. The DPO guides can answer a specific question, but scrolling through other people’s symptoms cannot tell you about yours.

Fill the days on purpose

Plan small, absorbing things for the hardest times of day: a walk, a film, a project, time with a friend who does not ask about the wait. ASRM lists methods often recommended to fertility patients, including exercise, journaling, meditation, mindfulness, guided imagery, music, yoga and support groups.⁵

Tell people what you need

ASRM points out that telling someone to relax can make them feel blamed and more stressed; asking how they are and listening helps more.⁵ It can help to tell a partner or friend in advance what you want to hear, and whether you want to be asked about the test.

Getting through it as a couple

Partners often cope differently: one wants to talk about it every day, the other wants not to think about it. Agree on a check-in time, decide together how and when you will test, and plan what you will do that evening whatever the result. If the wait keeps causing conflict, couples-focused support, such as counseling with a therapist who knows infertility, can help.

When the result is negative

A negative test after months of trying can feel like a loss, even without a pregnancy. Give yourself time before deciding what to do next cycle. If you got a positive test and then a negative one or a period, that may have been an early loss; our pregnancy loss support guide is there for that.

When to get more support

If anxiety or low mood lasts most days for two weeks or more, or you stop sleeping, eating or working normally, talk to a doctor or therapist. Free peer groups and therapists who understand fertility are listed in our Support hub. If you have thoughts of harming yourself, call or text 988 now; it is free, confidential and open 24/7.⁷